Search Results for "freedom from tyranny"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share February 05, 2012's comic on:


Tags #boss, #business lunch, #employee, #freedom from tyranny, #lunch, #talk work, #waddle, #waddle away

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Boss: That restaurant was great. Dilbert: I know. I plan to go there someday for lunch. Boss: We just ate lunch. Dilbert: That wasn't lunch. Boss: It wasn't? Dilbert: You talked about work the entire time. Lunch is not defined by food. It's defined by freedom from tyranny. My lunch hour will begin the minute you waddle away. Was this going well until I said "waddle?"

Robot With No Freedom

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Robot With No Freedom - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share January 22, 2016's comic on:


Tags #freedom, #technology, #robots, #existentialism, #job, #employment, #philosophy

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Dilbert: What does it feel like to be a robot with no freedom? Robot: I feel the same as you, but with a greater awareness of my condition. Dilbert: I have to run to another meeting. Robot: Enjoy your freedom.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share November 25, 2011's comic on:


Tags #retail business, #service business, #buy company's prodcut, #pulling teeth, #commissions to salary, #free from tyranny, #customer service, #less than ideal, #no paperwork

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Dilbert: I want to buy your company's product but it's like pulling teeth with you. Man: Ha ha! I switched from commissions to a guaranteed salary. I'm free from the tyranny of customer service! Dilbert: This is less than ideal. Man: No paperwork for me! Woot! Woot!

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share March 17, 2012's comic on:


Tags #civil liberties, #internet & world wide web, #internet law, #bad for business, #press relase, #impinge, #freedom of speech, #selfish liars

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Boss: Our company opposes passage of the new internet law because it would be bad for our business. But that sounds selfish, so we'll issue a press release saying the new law would impinge freedom of speech. Alice: So... we're selfish liars? Boss: You can't get more free than that!

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share October 05, 1998's comic on:


Tags #misses staff meeting, #buy donuts, #freedom donuts

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The Boss, Wally, Dilbert and Alice sit at the conference table. The Boss says, "From now on, anyone who misses a staff meeting must buy donuts for the next meeting." Wally, Dilbert and Alice look at each other. The Boss sits at a now empty conference table. The boss thinks, "Did I just sell them their freedom for donuts?"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share April 11, 2008's comic on:


Tags #advice to intern, #don't finish on deadline, #freedom, #overworked, #less time, #nitpick

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wally: Heed my advice, young Asok. Only an idiot finishes a project before the deadline. The less time you give people to nitpick. The more time you have to pretend you are overworked." Freedom is just another word for people finding out you're useless.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share October 02, 2005's comic on:


Tags #negative commentray, #blog, #fire, #freedom of speech, #our founding fathers, #spitting on graves, #not good work, #final paycheck

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"Ted, you've been saying negative things about the company in your personal blog. We have to fire you." "I have freedom of speech. It's my constitutional right to say whatever I want." "If you fire me for my opinions, you'll be spitting on the graves of our founding fathers." "I'll get the best lawyer that money can't buy, and fight you all the way to the Supreme Court!" "The only way you can legally fire me is if my work isn't good." "Ooh. I probably said too much here." "Your work isn't good. Here's your final paycheck." "Stupid founding fathers."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share October 21, 2001's comic on:


Tags #bad attitude, #bad news, #bad perfromance, #boss meeting, #downsized, #dump, #free from tyranny, #rational, #profits

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Catbert is standing in the doorway of The Boss' office. Catbert says, "Bad news." Catbert continues, "The employees figured out that they won't get raises next year because profits are in the dumps." The Boss gasps. Catbert's voice continues, "And they're being rational about it." Asok says to Wally, "We are free from the tyranny of having to work hard for raises." Wally exclaims, "Ooh-yah!" Wally continues, "But there's a delicate balance because we don't want to be down-sized." Wally continues, "I figure we can either have bad attitudes or bad performance but not both." Asok says, "I think I'll try having a bad attitude." Wally replies, "'I'm a bad performance man myself." Wally and Asok are sitting in The Boss' office. Wally says, "I just realized that my entire job can be done by guessing." Asok says, "Hey, dip-weed."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share March 08, 2014's comic on:


Tags #choosing, #thinking, #tests, #orange buttons, #more clicks, #than green, #lost faith, #human intelligence, #green looks better, #liberated, #tyranny of thinking

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Dilbert: Our A-B tests show that orange buttons get 13% more clicks than green. I have now officially lost all faith in human intelligence. Boss: Stick with the green. It looks better. Dilbert: Sure. I feel liberated from the tyranny of thinking.

Wally Resists The Tyranny Of Productivity

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Wally Resists The Tyranny Of Productivity - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share November 02, 2015's comic on:


Tags #useless, #laziness, #productivity, #flaw, #strength

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Wally: Some people say uselessness is a character flaw. I see it as the natural result of mindful resistance to the tyranny of productivity. Dilbert: Where do you think food comes from? Wally: From my critics. It's a great system.