Search Results for "freedom from tyranny"
Share February 05, 2012's comic on:
Boss: That restaurant was great. Dilbert: I know. I plan to go there someday for lunch. Boss: We just ate lunch. Dilbert: That wasn't lunch. Boss: It wasn't? Dilbert: You talked about work the entire time. Lunch is not defined by food. It's defined by freedom from tyranny. My lunch hour will begin the minute you waddle away. Was this going well until I said "waddle?"
Share January 22, 2016's comic on:
Dilbert: What does it feel like to be a robot with no freedom? Robot: I feel the same as you, but with a greater awareness of my condition. Dilbert: I have to run to another meeting. Robot: Enjoy your freedom.
Share November 25, 2011's comic on:
Dilbert: I want to buy your company's product but it's like pulling teeth with you. Man: Ha ha! I switched from commissions to a guaranteed salary. I'm free from the tyranny of customer service! Dilbert: This is less than ideal. Man: No paperwork for me! Woot! Woot!
Share March 17, 2012's comic on:
Boss: Our company opposes passage of the new internet law because it would be bad for our business. But that sounds selfish, so we'll issue a press release saying the new law would impinge freedom of speech. Alice: So... we're selfish liars? Boss: You can't get more free than that!
Share April 11, 2008's comic on:
wally: Heed my advice, young Asok. Only an idiot finishes a project before the deadline. The less time you give people to nitpick. The more time you have to pretend you are overworked." Freedom is just another word for people finding out you're useless.
Share March 08, 2014's comic on:
Dilbert: Our A-B tests show that orange buttons get 13% more clicks than green. I have now officially lost all faith in human intelligence. Boss: Stick with the green. It looks better. Dilbert: Sure. I feel liberated from the tyranny of thinking.
Share November 02, 2015's comic on:
Wally: Some people say uselessness is a character flaw. I see it as the natural result of mindful resistance to the tyranny of productivity. Dilbert: Where do you think food comes from? Wally: From my critics. It's a great system.
Share February 29, 2016's comic on:
Asok: Now that I have tasted the sweet freedom of being an Uber driver, how can I go back to this life? Wally: Try looking deep within yourself, Asok. Asok: You are even wiser than usual. Wally: You'll need a flashlight and yoga lessons.
Share March 01, 2016's comic on:
Asok: I miss the freedom I had as an Uber driver. This job feels like being trapped under rubble. Wally: We old-timers have a name for that feeling. Asok: What is it? Wally: "Better than average."
Share April 24, 2016's comic on:
Boss: Schedule your training during your lunch hours so it doesn't impact your projects. Dilbert: But... my lunch hour is the only freedom I experience in a typical day. The rest of my time is either scheduled to the minute or driven by whatever crisis is happening. Please don't take my lunch hour and reduce me to nothing but a prisoner in a digital chain gang. I'm barely clinging to my illusion of free will as it is. This could push me over the edge. If you take away my one hour of freedom in the day, I might as well be a robot. Boss: Relax. This is temporary. Dilbert: For how long? Boss: Until I can replace you with a robot.