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Dilbert Does Online Dating

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Dilbert Does Online Dating - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share December 31, 2014's comic on:


Tags #dating, #internet dating, #low standards, #online dating, #triple threat, #six feet tall, #hair, #height, #job, #business, #relationships

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Dilbert: I got 9,752 responses on this dating site and I haven't even completed my profile. All I said is that I'm six feet tall, I have hair and a job. Meanwhile, everywhere: Women: Hair... height... job! Triple threat!

Dating Is A B Testing

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Dating Is A B Testing - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share January 05, 2015's comic on:


Tags #analysis, #comparison, #dating, #first date, #judging, #a-b testing, #click with, #analytics, #measuring, #too many questions, #relationships, #science

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Woman: Have you been dating a lot? Dilbert: I call it A-B testing. I go on dates and then compare the analytics to see who I click with most.Woman: What exactly are you measuring? Dilbert: Asks too many questions.

Company Policy About Dating

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Company Policy About Dating - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share May 11, 2016's comic on:


Tags #dating, #relationships, #office romance, #policy, #legal issues, #human resources, #business

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Catbert: Rumor has it that you are dating a co-worker named Loud Howard. Company policy requires you to register your lustful feelings with our legal department. Lawyer: Okay, I think we have you covered, but the stapling phase will sting a little.

Ceo Uses Dating App

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 Ceo Uses Dating App  - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share October 06, 2017's comic on:


Tags #dating, #app, #technology, #tinder, #match, #cheating, #adultery, #eskimo brothers, #relationships

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CEO: I love this dating app. Wally: I thought you were married. CEO: I'm just looking. What's the worst thing that could happen? CEO: Hey, what's my wife doing on here? Wally: Your wife/?? That's my girlfriend!

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share March 09, 2012's comic on:


Tags #dating, #internet & world wide web, #dating site, #social media, #propsects, #addicted, #facebook, #pain meds, #prescription pain meds, #eye contact, #relationships, #technology

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Dilbert: I've got two good prospects on this dating site. One is addicted to Facebook and the other is addicted to prescription pain meds. Dogbert: Sort of a tie. Dilbert: But only one of them is likely to make eye contact.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share April 17, 1989's comic on:


Tags #dating, #ice cream, #relationships

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Dilbert and Dogbert sit outdoors . Dilbert is holding an ice cream cone. Dilbert says, "I can remember when these were only fifteen cents." Dilbert continues, "But I'm really dating myself now . . ." Dogbert says, "Well, it's not as if anybody else would date you."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share June 16, 1989's comic on:


Tags #car, #dating, #eyes, #lucky, #relationships

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Dilbert sits in his chair and Dogbert sits on Dilbert's legs. Dogbert asks, "Did you ever think how lucky people are that their eyes are located on their heads?" Dogbert continues, "Suppose your eyes were on your ankles; you wouldn't be able to drive a car." Dilbert leaves. Dogbert continues, "Without cars, dating would be impossible. No dating, then no marriage. Soon the species would be extinct."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share November 16, 1990's comic on:


Tags #dilbert's, #ego, #porsche, #woman, #Dilbert, #dating, #bar

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Dogbert: Nice toupee. Dilbert's Ego: Thanks. It's the, "Roy Orbison," model. I am now ready to hit the dating scene. Woman at Bar: Really? You drive a porsche? Dilbert's Ego: It's red... But enough about me.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share August 08, 1994's comic on:


Tags #after marriage, #get phsyical, #husband be mad, #look sad, #oddly appealing, #dating a while, #liz

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Liz: We've been dating for a while and I find you oddly appealing... But I don't believe in getting physical until after Im married. wouldn't your husband get mad? LIZ: Sometimes it okay just to look sad and shut up.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share October 14, 1994's comic on:


Tags #2004, #cheaper than dating, #date at door, #Dogbert, #future, #holodeck, #virtual reality, #writing article, #money, #male hormones

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Dogbert: "I can predict the future by assuming that money and male hormones are the driving forces for new technology." "Therefore, when virtual reality gets cheaper than dating, society is doomed." "Year 2004" Date: "Is Dilbert available?" DOgbert: "He's been in the holodeck since March."