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Why All The Women Leave

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Why All The Women Leave - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share December 31, 2015's comic on:


Tags #Women, #technology, #quitting, #repulsion, #standards, #gender, #hiring, #sabotage

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Boss: Why do all of the women I hire quit within the first week? Wally: I'm guessing they have high standards, or something along those lines. Boss: They seem to quit soon after they meet you. Wally: Hypothesis confirmed.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share February 26, 2011's comic on:


Tags #contracts, #relations between the sexes, #Women, #ignorantly signed, #legal strategy, #affadavit, #attractive women, #have cooties

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Man says, "The contract that you ignorantly signed gives them the right to harvest your organs." Man says, "Your best legal strategy is to get sworn affidavits from attractive women saying you have cooties." Woman says, "Heck yes, I'll sign it." Dilbert says, "I was hoping this would be harder."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share January 21, 2012's comic on:


Tags #dating, #rich people, #top 1%, #Women, #sisters, #hot, #attraction, #co worker

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Wally: Now that I'm a top one-percenter, I wonder what kind of women I'll attract. Do you have any sisters back home? I'm asking because you'd be totally hot if you were a woman. So I'm thinking hoo-ah! Asok: I cannot count the number of ways this is wrong.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share June 30, 1989's comic on:


Tags #computer, #Women, #personality

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Dilbert sits at his desk. Dilbert says, "There . . . My program proves that pretty women have extremely bad personalities." Dilbert continues, "This is based on the input that pretty women are never nice to me." Dogbert asks, "Why does the screen say 'or you are a geek?'" Dilbert replies, "Darn! I thought I fixed that bug."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share January 21, 1994's comic on:


Tags #pheromone cologne, #women desries, #reconcile mentally, #wash cologne, #aerobics class

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Dilbert: The pheremone cologne is making women desire me physically but they can't reconcile it mentally. women: NNNO Dilbert: It isn't fair...I'll have to wash the cologne off... dilbert: Right after my aerobics class.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share January 22, 1994's comic on:


Tags #opposites attract, #beautiful women, #drawing power, #women love pose, #intellectually staimulating

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Dogbert: "You're unsuccessful in love because you keep forgetting opposites attract." Dogbert: "Logically, the woman who would be most attracted to you are beautiful and intellectually stimulating." Dilbert: "You're right. I've been underestimating my drawing power." Dogbert: "And women love it when you pose like this for them."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share August 29, 1995's comic on:


Tags #tweaking brittle, #brittle people, #tech wroter, #forms of expression, #insult gender, #tina, #orgs of expression, #venus de milo, #Women, #lift heavy objects

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Dogbert stands behind Dilbert's desk and says, "I feel like tweaking some brittle people. Do you known any brittle people?" Dilbert responds, "Try Tina the tech writer. She believes that all forms of expression are an insult to her gender and her profession." Dogbert says to Tina, "The statue of 'Venus de Milo' has no arms." Tina replies angrily, "Oh, I get it. You're saying that women can't lift heavy objects."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share September 01, 1995's comic on:


Tags #tina brittlke tech, #dysfunctional, #opinions, #email, #women portrayed, #lawyers, #startship captains, #art class

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Dogbert and Tina are sitting at a table. Dogbert says to the reader, "This week, we introduced Tina the Brittle Tech Writer to the strip. Tina is dysfunctional like everybody here except me." Tina growls, "RRRR." Dogbert continues, "Send your opinions by e-mail to scottadams@aol.com. It's the only way we can learn." Tina growls, "RRRR." A written list says, "PICK ONE: A. Women should only be portrayed as lawyers and starship captains. B. I don't have e-mail. C. Tina should be treated with the same dignity as Dilbert and Wally. D. Take an art class."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share October 17, 1996's comic on:


Tags #consultant, #attractive women, #trade show booth, #rejected idea, #sexist, #demeaning, #increase traffic, #dental floss, #thong bikini dilberts

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Dilbert, Alice, Wally and the Boss sit at a conference table. Alice says, "Our consultant suggested putting attractive women in our booth at the trade show." Alice continues, "I rejected that idea. It is sexist and demeaning. I have a better idea to increase traffic to our booth." Dilbert asks, "What's the dental floss for?" Alice replies, "It's your thong bikini. You'll stand in front of our competitor's booth."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share August 14, 1998's comic on:


Tags #moon, #nasa hides women, #love male engineers, #drinking contest, #loser, #never return, #entering contest

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Caption: Somewhere on the moon. The engineers and Dilbert are in a standoff. Engineer 1 says, "So, you discovered where NASA hides the women who love male engineers." Engineer 1 says, "How about a little drinking contest, tough guy? The loser can nver return." The three engineer loving women lie slumped on the surface of the moon surrounded by empty alcohol bottles. Woman 1 says "We probably shouldn't have insisted on entering the contest." Woman 2 says, "I'll miss them."