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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share May 28, 1999's comic on:


Tags #million bucks, #pay up, #double or nothing, #won't go to work, #naked, #exact words

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Dilbert comes home from work still wearing his robe.. Dilbert says, to dogbert, "You said you'd give me a million bucks if I went to work like this. Pay up." Dogbert says, "I'll bet you double or nothing that you won't go to work totally naked." Dilbert sits naked in his cubicle and thinks, "Wait... what were his exact words?"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share July 28, 1999's comic on:


Tags #juan delegator, #assignment, #do your work, #favor, #haircut

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Dilbert works at his computer. A man with a large mustache hands dilbert a piece of paper and says, "My name is Juan Delegator. I bring you an assignment." Dilbert looks at the sheet and says, "This is YOUR assignment. You're trying to get me to do your work." Juan says, "Teamwork!" Dilbert says, "Well I guess I could do you a favor." Juan holds out a pair of scissors and says, "And I wouldn't say now to a haircut."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share July 29, 1999's comic on:


Tags #juan delegator, #requires deciosn, #work on, #more assignments, #learned lesson, #give work to alice

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Caption: "Juan Delegator" The Boss carries a large pile of paper. Juan hands him another piece and says, "..And this also requires your decision before I can work on it." Juan says, "Do you have any more assignments for me that I can turn into work for you?" The boss says, "No." Juan says, "And have you learned your lesson?" The boss says, "Yes: Give all work to Alice."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share August 10, 1999's comic on:


Tags #gigantic product document, #destroyed, #freak accident, #thomas edison work

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Asok, Wally and Dilbert stare at a large book. Dilbert says, "One of us will have to read this gigantic product requirements document." Wally says, "Unless it gets destroyed in a freak accident." Wally says, "I have some oily rags in mu cube." Asok thinks, "It's like watching Thomas Edison work."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share September 10, 1999's comic on:


Tags #prospective client, #touring dept, #marketing department, #vacant cubicle, #pretending to work

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The boss stands in Dilbert's cubicle. The boss says, "A prospective client will be touring our marketing department in an hour." The boss says, "We need you to sit in a vacant cubicle so it looks as if work is done there." Dilbert sits in an empty cubicle pretending to type. a woman points and says, "Hey! that one is only pretending to work!"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share September 20, 1999's comic on:


Tags #boss in office, #thank me, #all hard work, #measure torso, #knitting sweater

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Carol stands in the doorway of Asok's cube with a measuring tape. Carol says, "Asok, the boss wants to see you in his office." Asok says, "He must want to thank me for all my hard work. Am I right?" Carol says, "I'm supposed to measure your torso." Asok says, "Is he knitting me a sweater?"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share September 21, 1999's comic on:


Tags #air duct, #award for good work, #been summoned, #intern, #boss office

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ASok stands in Wally's cube. Asok says, "I have been summoned to the boss's office." Asok says, "He probably wants to give me some sort of award for my good work as an intern." Carol and The Boss look at the ceiling in his office. Asok can be seen through the window smiling. Carol says, "Why do you need to know where that air duct ends?" The Boss says, "It's been bugging me."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share November 25, 1999's comic on:


Tags #the turnaround ceo, #work of 10 people, #strategic planning, #traitorous mole

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The Turnaround CEO Dilbert is standing in front of the CEO's desk saying, "If you let me keep my job, I'll do the work of ten people." The CEO looks like the devil. Dilbert goes on, "Specifically, it would be the ten people in our strategic planning group." Dilbert says, "They don't do much." The CEO replies, "I'd like you to be my traitorous mole."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share December 01, 1999's comic on:


Tags #telecommuting, #rest and pampered, #sick, #pajamas, #work clothes

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Dilbert is holding a mug and says to Wally, who is sitting at his computer: "I thought you were telecommuting today". Wally says: "I'm sick" Wally says to Dilbert: "So I came into the office to get some rest and be pampered" Wally says to Dilbert: "Fortunately, my pajamas look exactly like work clothes"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share December 17, 1999's comic on:


Tags #best employees, #world, #refuse to work, #low pay, #improve morale

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The boss, Wally and Dilbert are in a meeting. The boss has a sheet of paper and a pen on the table. The boss says: "We have the best employees in the world..." The boss says: "...not counting the people who refuse to work here because the pay is so low." The boss thinks while writing something: "Improve morale... done." Wally and Dilbert look away.